A modern remake of The Wizard of Oz

MGM’s cinema classic, The Wizard of Oz has never had a worthy sequel. Granted, the stage production of The Wiz was quite well done, but it did not merit being called a sequel. The 1985 Return to Oz film premised Dorothy hospitalized in a mental institution for electroshock therapy. I can see why that one never made it to cult status. Film critic Gene Siskel’s advice about seeing that film was one word: “Don’t.”

Today, however, we have a wonderful opportunity to bring those great characters back to the silver screen. Realizing the cost of making movies has skyrocketed since L. Frank Baum’s classic first came to your neighborhood cinemas, we are fortunate today to have a ‘three-for-one’ available. ‘Tin-Man’ Jack Haley sang about wishing he had a brain; ‘Scarecrow’ Ray Bolger suffered from lack of heart, and ‘Cowardly Lion’ Bert Lahr bemoaned his lack of nerve. Today’s filmmaker could save two-thirds of the casting cost of these three iconic characters by having Joe Biden play all three roles.

It’s pretty much a given that our President lacks all three items missing from the original iconic characters. The wonderful coincidence of one man so clearly lacking heart, brain, and nerve should not be wasted.

Even more cost-cutting opportunities present themselves for our modern cinematographer. Joe can do his own stunt work. He can fall down with the best of them, and I’m sure a soundstage could be built in Biden’s basement. The piece de resistance of our pending cinematic masterpiece will be Kamala Harris in the role of Dorothy. Providing her progressive friends don’t cause her to refuse the role due to cultural appropriation, our heels-in-the-air VP would look marvelous sporting those ruby slippers. Oz-24, coming soon to a theater near you.

Bill Hansmann is a dentist and dental educator with over fifty years in the profession. He continues to teach and write political blogs and semi-mediocre novels while living with his wife and cats in Georgia.

Image: Public Domain