An old joke, updated – American Thinker

Here’s an old Jewish joke that I’ve been telling for years, and it goes back even further than that; I might’ve first heard a version of it told by Jackie Mason. It’s been repeated with various changes in the world leaders about whom it’s told. This is the latest incarnation of it, which I’ve updated for current events. And, in light of those current events, it’s not nearly as funny as it’s been in the past, but the point it makes is probably more important than ever.

U.S. Secretary of State Antony Blinken is visiting Jerusalem, and is being hosted by Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu. Blinken, who is [ostensibly] Jewish himself, tells Netanyahu that he has always wanted to visit the Western Wall, aka the Wailing Wall, one of the world’s holiest places.

The Western Wall is what remains of the Second Temple, where Jews have been praying since 200 years before the birth of Christ and 900 years before the religion known as Islam ever appeared.

Image: The Western Wall by DGtal. CC BY-SA 4.0.

Blinken tells Netanyahu that he wants to ask God for a special blessing at the Western Wall. Netanyahu is thrilled. “What a wonderful idea!” he tells Blinken. “For over 2000 years, it’s been said that when one prays at the Western Wall, God hears every word!”

So they go to the Western Wall, and Blinken puts on a yarmulke, which Israelis call a kippah, and he stands right up against the Wall and touches it, like Orthodox Jews and many others do, and begins to pray.

“Oh Heavenly Father,” Blinken intones, “I pray for a special blessing for my Israeli hosts, and for all the people of this Holy Land! Be they Jew, Christian, or Muslim, may they all enjoy peace, good health, and prosperity!”

Netanyahu says, “What a lovely prayer and a truly noble wish, Secretary Blinken! From your lips, to God’s ear, when you pray at the Western Wall!”

And Blinken continues, “Heavenly Father, I ask for a truly special blessing, on behalf of not only myself but also President Biden and his entire administration, and even former President Obama: May the Israelis find it in their hearts to understand Hamas and the people Hamas represents and who support Hamas. And as Israel responds to the murders, the taking of hostages, the rapes, the torture, the mutilations, the beheadings of children, and all the unspeakable atrocities perpetrated on October 7, may that response be tempered by compassion, restraint, moderation and, above all, proportionality!”

Whereupon Netanyahu taps Blinken on the shoulder and says, “Hey, Schmuck! You’re talkin’ to a wall!!”

Author’s Note: Stu Tarlowe has, since 2010, contributed well over 150 pieces to American Thinker. In addition to being an entrepreneur, raconteur, chanteur, boulevardier and dilettante (in the best sense of the word), he is a semi-retired Boardwalk Pitchman and a joke collector and joke wrangler. His personal pantheon of heroes and role models includes Barry Farber, Jean Shepherd, Long John Nebel, Bob Grant, Rush Limbaugh, Aristide Bruant, Col. Jeff Cooper, Rabbi Meir Kahane, G. Gordon Liddy, Hunter S. Thompson, Emmett Grogan, Theo Kojak, Paladin and Rin Tin Tin. His Substack newsletter, Stu’s Stack o’Stuff, has lain fallow for more than a year, but he’s lately been threatening to revive it.