See Adam Sandler’s Daughter Sunny All Grown Up On the Red Carpet

Giving a nod to themselves, the teens jokingly added in why they couldn’t attend the event in person.

“We also wish we could be at tonight’s award show with all of you sophisticated people,” Adam continued, “but Daddy said, and we quote, ‘I don’t want to spend a whole night that’s supposed to be about me and my greatness listening to you two newly pubetized buffoons screaming, ‘Where is Timothée Chalamet and how can we legally squeeze that fine little Jewish ass of his?'”

But the girls found an upside to their absences, with the speech detailing how Sadie and Sunny joking plan on doing everything they’re “not allowed to do when Daddy is home.” 

“Like eat his Yodels, try on his Spanx, or – dare we say – laugh out loud at Ben Stiller movies,” he read.”The last time Daddy caught us chuckling away at the Meet the Parents trilogy, he immediately stormed into the room he calls ‘The Screaming Room,’ which we just call the shower, and bellowed out the phrase, ‘Only the Sandman makes people laugh!'”